Affirming Fatherhood Conference offers insights into challenges facing today’s families

The audience of mostly social workers heard about the dark world of human trafficking from a Hillsborough Sheriff’s detective; troubled families from a county drug treatment court judge; and the threat that too much screen time poses for kids’ eyes from a vision specialist.

They were among the speakers at the annual Affirming Fatherhood Conference presented by REACHUP, a nonprofit that for more than 20 years has worked to strengthen fathers’ bond with their families in Hillsborough County. The event was held at the Ybor City headquarters of the Children’s Board of Hillsborough County, which helps fund REACHUP.

“What we focus on is helping dads be more engaged. Because some dads are at home, but they’re not engaged with their families,’’ says Michael Morgan, male involvement network manager with REACHUP. “Our purpose is to let fathers know that when they’re engaged, the outcomes in their families are much better.’’

The nonprofit, whose main focus is improving maternal and infant mortality, runs programs throughout the year to get fathers engaged, including 24:7 Dad, structured weekly classes that provide “pro-fatherhood’’ knowledge, skills, and attitudes. REACHUP also helps with resources they need, such as preparing a resume, and can refer them to multiple agencies for assistance.

Morgan says they named the conference Affirming Fatherhood because there’s such a “negative narrative about fathers. So we want to change that narrative.’’

In keeping with this year’s conference theme, “Fatherhood: Built to Protect,’’ Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Det. Ryan J. Daniels, a member of the department’s Human Trafficking Section, stressed the need for parents to set controls on their children’s electronic devices and review their conversations on social media.

“We do a lot of those internet crimes against children investigations,’’ he says.

In an effort to lure predators, Daniels goes online pretending to be a 12-year-old girl or boy and posting a decoy picture.

“Within 30 seconds, I’d have 20 messages,’’ he says. “That’s how predatory it is.’’

A current trend of scammers is going after middle- and high-school-aged boys, getting them to send nude pictures of themselves, Daniels says.

“When your young boy is allowed to get on Instagram with no parental controls, and he has a pretty girl talking in his (direct messages)’’ – her image created by AI. “She sends him a little something, and then she asks him to send her a little something, and next thing you know he’s getting blackmailed on this.’’

Daniels points out that the kids’ phones “are your phones. You pay the bill, you bought that phone, that is your phone. There’s no invasion of privacy. That’s your child. That’s your device.’’

He urges parents to learn how to put controls on their phones and computers and place limits on how much time they spend on them.

“There are avenues out there where a 65-year-old male can talk to your 12-year-old daughter. That shouldn’t be okay. So arm yourself, family.’’

Jeff Mortensen, founder of True Focus Initiative, warned about the dangers to kids’ eyes, which are still developing, of too much screen time on phones, computers, and TV. If kids stay in front of their screen and stay all day indoors, their eyes become trained to focus on things that are near, sacrificing their distance vision.

They need to get their vision checked once a year so they can be referred right away to an eye doctor if they fail the screening.

“We are in the middle of a myopia crisis,’’ he says. “In the year 2000, one in four school-age kids had vision issues with myopia. Today, nearly 40 percent of kids 6 to 19 years of age have myopia…And by 2050, half the world’s population will be nearsighted.’’

Adding to the problem is a shortage of pediatric ophthalmologists. “It’s a race. All the kids with vision issues and we don’t have enough doctors to see them,’’ Mortensen says.

Social media platforms grab and hold their attention, driving more screen time. Kids are sitting closer to the screens; they are looking for a longer time, and they’re looking at them more often, he says.

Experts say children younger than 18 months should not be exposed to screen time at all, except live video time with parents and friends accompanied by an adult. From 18 months to age 5, only one hour of non-educational screen time per day. And from age 6 to 12, less than two hours of recreational screen time per day.

His advice for anyone spending time before a screen: stop every 20 minutes and take 20 seconds to look at something 20 feet away. That will help preserve distance vision.

Hillsborough County Judge Daryl Manning, who presides over a drug treatment court division and a unified family court division, told about his efforts to get fathers to take responsibility and help their families.

“The bottom line is we have some younger fathers in our community, and they have the ability to get involved, take on their responsibilities. Some have not, so we need to continue to do what we can to encourage them,’’ he says.

Relating what he sees in court, there aren’t many success stories, he tells the crowd, but there are some. In one case, a baby had to be removed from its home by the state Department of Children and Family Services because of issues the mother had. When that happens, the agency looks for a relative to take the baby. In this case, it was the 21-year-old absentee father.

He didn’t take the child initially, Manning says, but soon he showed up in court with his mother, ready to commit. Manning figures his mother probably provided a little kick, telling him, “You’re a dad now. Put the Nintendo down. Put the PlayStation down. Get off the couch and take care of your responsibilities.’’

After a couple of weeks in foster care, the child was turned over to the father, who cared for it with the help of his mother.

“In a subsequent follow-up, I found that the child was flourishing, met all medical appointments, reached all its milestones, and was doing well,’’ he says. And the mother was improving and was able to have visits with the child.

REACHUP was incorporated in 2006 with a focus on helping prevent maternal and infant mortality, says Estrellita “Lo Berry,” who founded the nonprofit with Deborah Austin and Vanessa Rowland-Mishkit.

Berry says she was motivated to do something because more than four Black babies were dying for every white baby who died.

“I knew from the jump that the missing link for the programs and the funding of programs was they left out the male. I urged our funders, particularly federal funders, to allow us to include the fatherhood piece in our interventions and our strategies, and it just went from there.’’

For more information about REACHUP, go to reachupincorporated.org.

For more information about the Children’s Board, go to childrensboard.org.